Has your sex life with your spouse cooled down since you got married?  Are you not getting the same satisfaction that you used to, and do you feel like there’s nothing you can do about it?

Dr. Trina Read joins us to talk about her book, Till Sex Do Us Part: Making Your Married Sex Irresistible, which focuses on the transition couples go through from single sex to married sex, and tells you what you can do to keep things satisfying after you’ve tied the knot.

Trina is a sexologist with a successful coaching practice who’s written for a variety of publications in addition to writing her own books.  She’s given interviews and lectures both in North America and overseas. You can go to her website, TrinaRead.com, to learn more and to find plenty of resources, and to TillSexDoUsPart.com to order her book for yourself.

Do you feel like you can’t live up to what your spouse expects from you in the bedroom? Or do you feel you’re not getting everything you think you should get from your spouse?

Dr. Sara Rosenquist joins us to discuss how our culture’s emphasis on sex can give us unrealistic expectations and put a strain on relationships, and gives advice on how couples can find satisfaction with each other – even if they aren’t in a hyper-sexual Hollywood romance.

Sara is a clinical psychologist with a private practice in Chapel Hill and Cary, NC, where she focuses on reproductive issues and sex therapy. You can find out more by visiting her website, DrSara.com, where she has some great articles and free resources available.

Has your sex life become so dissatisfying that you feel restless with your marriage, or even resentful of your spouse?

Marnia Robinson joins us to take a look at the science behind why steamy romance is destined to fade, what that means for the future of marriage, as well as to share some of her 31 tips for reengaging sexually with your spouse and using your biological instincts to rekindle passion.

Marnia is the author of Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Realationships, in which she challenges conventional approaches toward intimacy in relationships and examines the biological and neurological forces that shape our sexual desires. You can order the book from Amazon.com here, and find out more about Marnia and her research at her website, Reuniting.info

Creating A More Intimate Marriage

A Small Group Study

God created sexuality to reveal Himself and the value He places on intimate relationships.  Learning how God uses this metaphor will enhance the long-term relationship of covenant marriage.  In this 10-week study, led by Dr. Debbie Neel and Rev. Bob Stancil, married couples will gain biblical and practical insights about healthy sexual intimacy and learn ways of enhancing their love life.

In a safe and respectful environment, this study for couples will be based on the book A Celebration of Sex by Dr. Doug Rosenau with the accompanying Guidebook.  Doug was the speaker at our 2005 conference on Sexual Intimacy God’s Way.  Debbie Neel, who works closely with Doug and was instrumental in writing the Guidebook, is a licensed psychologist and certified Christian sex therapist.  Bob, as a pastoral counselor, also provides leadership to various aspects of the Providence marriage ministry.

The group will meet on Wednesdays beginning January 6 in Room 637 from 6:30 to 8:30 PM.  A charge of $40 per couple will cover the various books and study materials. For information, call Bob Stancil (919-326-3000).  Register online at www.pray.org/marriage.  Limited space.      Childcare is available by reservation: www.pray.org/sonstation

General Study Topics:

Increasing our knowledge about sexuality:

• A Biblical Perspective of Sexuality
• Essentials for an Intimate Marriage
• Uniquely Male and Female & Sexual Myths

Enhancing our pleasure:

• Lovemaking Cycle
• Emotional Pleasure & Romance
• Desire & Frequency
• Physical Enjoyment & Mutuality

Creating passionate intimacy:

• Making Love to Your Wife
• Making Love to Your Husband
• Affair-Proofing Your Marriage

A great marriage can seem like a bit of a mystery when conflict and communication issues are part of your daily routine. What are the secrets that couples with great marriages who know how to weather both the good and bat times are using in their relationships?

Linda and Charlie Bloom join us to discuss what they learned by interviewing couples who have made their marriages work despite difficult challenges, as well as what they’ve discovered in their marriage and counseling practice.

You can purchase a copy of the Blooms first book, 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married, and their upcoming book, Secrets of Great Marriages from Amazon.com, or by visiting their website, BloomWork.com, where you can find out more about their upcoming workshops and counseling services.

Sometimes, a lack of sex can be due to unresolved issues in the marriage, but often, it’s simply that we’ve become too caught up with daily life to change the status quo. Grab a pen, because Dr. Tina Lepage joins us to share seven (actually eight!) tips you can put to work right now to start having better sex more frequently with your spouse.

Tina is the founder of Lepage Associates, where she focuses on personal and professional relationship issues, as well as children and family therapy, and personal growth. You can find out more about Tina and her staff by visiting her website at LepageAssociates.com, or by calling her office at 919.572.0000

Has an affair left you unable to trust or respect your spouse, or are you concerned that a growing emotional distance between you and your partner may lead to infidelity? Dr. Stephen Frueh returns to the show to discuss what role each spouse plays in an affair and recovery and take a look at traditional views on blame and responsibility can drive a couple farther apart.

To find out more about Stephen’s speaking and workshops and to subscribe to his podcast, be sure to visit MarriageConversation.com, where you can learn more about his upcoming book, From Marginal To Magnificent: How to Make Your Marriage Sing. You can also check out his last book, With These Rings at Amazon.com. Stephen also recommends Bruce Derman’s We’d Have A Great Relationship if It Weren’t For You for any couple that feels their marriage is marginal.

Has the need to check one more email, take one more call, or watch one more episode made family time and one-on-one communication with your spouse an impossibility? Do you feel that your partner has tuned you out in favor of constant connectivity to things outside your marriage? Dr. Colleen Hamilton returns to the show to examine what constitutes a normal level of distraction in our day to day lives and both the causes and effects of disconnecting from the relationship on both you and your spouse.

Colleen practices with Lepage Associates in Durham, NC, where she specializes in interpersonal relationships, depression and anxiety, children’s therapy, and parent coaching. You can find out more about Colleen by visiting the Lepage Associates website, or calling her office at 919.572.0000

With a baby on the way, life can become even more hectic than usual and your relationship with your spouse can be one of the first things to suffer. The physical changes can be hard enough to deal with, but what impact do changes in mood, increased responsibility, and the limelight (or lack thereof for dads) of pregnancy have on the relationship? Does the length of time you’ve been married before having a child make things easier? Dr. Kristen Wynns returns tot he show to take a look at how factors like length of marriage, number of other children, and emotional preparedness can impact intimacy with your spouse.

Dr. Wynns has a newly relocated practice in Cary, NC and specializes in therapy for children, adolescents, and families. You can find out more about Dr. Wynns practice and services at her website, KristenWynns.com, or by calling her office at 919.805.0182. Kristen also has a brand new blog called Marriage and Parenting 101 with great advice for parents.

Has weight become a “big” issue in your marriage? Is it leading to intimacy problems, control issues, and health concerns that you don’t know how to address?  It’s easy for a marriage to run into trouble when one spouse puts on a significant amount of weight but can be difficult to address in a compassionate and constructive way.  Dr. Susan Orenstein joins us to discuss what factors can contribute to weight gain in a marriage, the relationship between eating and emotions, and how to approach such a touchy subject without causing conflict.

Dr. Orenstein is a licensed Psychologist with a private practice in Cary, NC and a newly opened location in Chapel Hill, NC.  She also conducts the Stay Happily Married seminar series in Raleigh.  You can find out more about Dr. Orenstein at www.orensteinsolutions.com

Has physical intimacy taken a back seat to other responsibilities in your marriage?  Have you tried rekindling the spark you and your spouse had when you were first married with little success? Terry Northcutt, Director of Marriage Enrichment Programs with the Family Dynamics Institute,  joins us to discuss how to strengthen that intimate bond and bring passion back to your marriage.  He also discusses the programs and seminars available that are designed to help married couples renew their intimacy.

Terry is a former senior pastor who now serves as the Director of Marriage Enrichment Programs  at the Family Dynamics Institute.    You can find out more about the Family Dynamics Institute and the multitude of courses and workshops they offer by calling 800-650-9995, or visiting FamilyDynamics.net and SaveMyMarriage.com.

Do you ever wish you could bring back the excitement and energy you and your spouse had when dating, or have you just accepted that your relationship won’t have the sizzle it did at the beginning? Author Lindsey Rietzsch joins us to talk about why you shouldn’t stop dating your spouse just because you are married and shares her favorite tips for putting the spark back in your relationship.

Lindsey started out designing and teaching self management and relationship courses, one of which was so popular that it inspired the book “How To Date Your Spouse”. You can find out more about Lindsey and her book on her website, HowToDateYourSpouse.com, which also includes Lindsey’s blog and relationship forum. Buy How to Date Your Spouse from Amazon.com

Is it possible to add the romantic flare of an epic fantasy to your daily life of work, carpool, and grocery shopping? Are big, gallant gestures always required to make your spouse feel loved, or are the smaller, every-day expressions of care and commitment more important?

Romance author Sonja Foust joins us to discuss what she has learned about being married from writing romance novels, as well as what being a romance author has taught her about marriage, and covers the importance of everyday romantic gestures and pitfalls of setting unrealistic expectations for yourself and your spouse. You can find out more about Sonja and her writing at her website, SonjaFoust.com

What used to require a secret trip to a shady newsstand and the risk of being spotted by a friend or neighbor is now just keyclicks away. With pornography becoming easier to obtain and less of a social stigma, has its presence become a stumbling-block in your relationship? Dr. Nicole Imbraguglio joins us to discuss the patterns and effects of pornography use in a marriage and the impact it has on both spouses, as well as how a couple can reconcile their feelings and behavior with one another.

Dr. Imbraguglio practices with Lepage Associates in Durham, NC and helps both adults and children with a wide range of emotional issues. She has provided counseling for individuals, groups, couples, and families. You can learn more about Nicole at LepageAssociates.com.

Is your bedroom so cluttered or so spartan that relaxation and romance are simply impossible? Most of us are guilty of either filling up the bedroom with junk that won’t fit anywhere else, or treating it like a cold and sterile museum. Jenna Boyd joins us to cover common mistakes in bedroom organization and to share tips and simple changes you can make today to turn your bedroom into a stress-free haven for intimacy and romance.

Jenna is a certified practitioner of Feng Shui, a member of the National Association of Professional Organizers, and contributor to PINK Magazine. You can find out more about Jenna at ElementsOfHarmony.com or by calling her office at 919.757.2732

Choosing a marriage counselor can be a difficult and sometimes scary task. Where do you find a qualified counselor? Will your insurance cover therapy? How can you be sure that you and your spouse are getting the most out of therapy and that the counselor you have selected is a good fit for your relationship? Amy McMillan joins us to share some tips on where to look and what to look for in a prospective counselor.

Amy is a Board Certified Licensed Professional Counselor. She has been in private practice since 1999 at her Cary office and recently opened up a satellite office in Raleigh. To find out more about Amy and the services she offers, visit her at CaryBehavioral.com and BelieveInTherapy.com

Every marriage faces issues where one or both partners feel frustrated with the level of intimacy in the relationship, but these incompatibility problems can create bigger difficulties when spouses feel like they can’t bring up the topic with their partners. Dr. Katrina Kuzyszyn joins us to discuss how you can bring up issues of sexual incompatibility with your spouse without creating a sense of pressure or rejection from either partner.

Katrina holds a Masters degree in Forensic Psychology, a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, and has been practicing for over 9 years. Katrina practices with Lepage Associates in Durham, NC and can be reached at 919.572.0000, or by visiting LepageAssociates.com

What makes a marriage counselor decide to go in for counseling? Jennifer Coleman is a Life Transition Coach with Rosen Law Firm who has worked as a marriage counselor as well and joins us to talk about her experience visiting a marriage therapist with her husband. Jennifer discusses how she and her husband decided on a counselor, why they decided to go, how many sessions they needed, and how they knew when their issues were resolved.

Jennifer discusses the initial apprehension that even she had about seeing a therapist and shares some tips on making the process more comfortable for both you and your spouse. She also gives advice on the benefits of seeing a counselor before any major crises arise and how to focus on your spouse and your marriage amidst the stressors of daily life.

Can a weekend getaway really help your marriage? Does counseling with other couples have benefits over a more traditional approach? Richard and Diana Daffner join us to discuss their “Intimacy Retreats”, where couples take a weekend to focus exclusively on the intimate bond with each other and cover the key differences between traditional therapy and marriage retreats, including the benefits a group dynamic has over private sessions, the kind of interaction couples have with each other, and whether some couples find group therapy easier than conventional practice.

You can find out much more about Richard and Diana’s intimacy retreats on their website, IntimacyRetreats.com, or by calling them at 1.877.282.4244. The website also includes a schedule of upcoming retreats from November through February, as well as information on Richard and Diana’s upcoming book, Tantric Sex for Busy Couples.

It’s always better to stop a problem before it begins than trying to fix it after the fact.  Dr. Betty Phillips joins us to discuss some of the underlying causes of marital infidelity and why problems couples have that may seem trivial or unrelated to the relationship can lead to affairs.  Dr. Phillips also takes time to discuss some of the common indicators that a marriage needs more attention to ensure that infidelity does not become a reality.

Dr. Phillips holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Harvard University and is certified by the National Register of Psychologists. She specializes in relationship and marriage counseling, including helping couples deal with the challenge of recovering from infidelity. Her office is located at 466 Eagle Point Rd. Pittsboro, NC 27312. You can find out more about Dr. Phillips practice, as well as other articles she has written on her website, or by contacting her at (919) 967.1860

By Betty Phillips

Author and researcher Maggie Scarf joins us to discuss her latest book, September Songs: The Good News About Marriage in the Later Years.  In the book, Maggie examines the “Bonus Years”, or 20+ years after 50 that increased life expectancy has created in the past few generations, and takes a look at how marital satisfaction increases during this phase.

Maggie covers communication, sex, problem solving, and financial issues that affect this stage of life and why it often doesn’t get the coverage it deserves, as well as what she describes as the “U-shaped curve” of marital happiness.

September Songs is out now on Riverhead Books.  You can click here to order it from Amazon.com, or visit Maggie’s website for more information, as well as her blog and other articles.

The openness of marriage is an opportunity for a great deal of trust, but can also result in your most personal information used against you in heated arguements. Dr. Katrina Kuzsyzyn-Jones discusses the effects of using intimate knowledge in fights with your spouse and offers tips for fighting constructively, without personal attacks.

Katrina holds a Masters degree in Forensic Psychology, a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, and has been practicing for over 9 years. Katrina practices with Lepage Associates in Durham, NC and can be reached at 919.572.0000, or by visiting LepageAssociates.com

Worried that your spouse cannot satisfy you intimately? In this episode Dr. Debbie Neel returns (her previous visit can be found here) to discuss the differences of emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy, saying that integrating them allows for a strong, satisfied marriage. Emotional intimacy is the understanding, appreciation, and acceptance between mates: the ‘I love you unconditionally.’ Sexual intimacy is the physical openness, communication, and comfort of love and affection also requiring unconditional acceptance. Dr. Neel notes the differences in mental wiring of men and women, how their thoughts and expectations differ, showing that husbands and wives are not intentionally neglecting each other and argues that couples should understand they will change physically and emotionally and that good communication can help avoid a breakdown of intimacy.

Debbie Neel is a licenced psychologist, certified health services provider and certified sex therapist with a private practice in Raleigh North Carolina. She specializes in individual adult and couples therapy, sex therapy, and attention deficit disorder in adults. To find out more about Debbie and her practice, visit her website at http://www.atriumpsychology.com, or call her at (919) 781-8810.

Do changes in desire for your spouse mean that you are no longer in love? Debbie Neel, PhD. discusses how intimacy and desire mature over the course of a marriage and how to understand and enjoy a deeper relationship with your spouse. Physiological and hormonal changes that occur throughout a marriage may often send the wrong signal about loving one’s spouse, as does the waning sense of intimacy that can come from dealing with the mountain of day-to-day tasks that are pushed aside during the initial romance of a marriage.

Debbie Neel is a licenced psychologist, certified health services provider and certified sex therapist with a private practice in Raleigh North Carolina. She specializes in individual adult and couples therapy, sex therapy, and attention deficit disorder in adults. To find out more about Debbie and her practice, visit her website at http://www.atriumpsychology.com, or call her at (919) 781-8810.

It can be difficult to make an intimate relationship with your spouse a priority when a few years of work, kids, and other day-to-day responsibilities have crept in to your lives. When communication breaks down, the temptation to seek fulfillment outside of the marriage becomes much greater. Sherri Hughes, Certified Life Coach, Reiki Master, and Hypnotherapist, discusses what it takes to get a relationship back on track before serious problems arise.

Sherri practices in Raleigh North Carolina and offers a complementary 15 minute consultation to anyone interested in seeking marriage counseling. You can contact Sherri and find out more about her services by visiting her website at http://www.journeybeginswithin.com.

Have you built an “Us” in your marriage?

In this podcast, Lesli Doares, LMFT, discusses the concept of building an “Us,” for married couples. Doares gives a list of steps to follow for the most crucial transition in your marriage.

Lesli’s practice in Cary, North Carolina, Balanced Family Therapy, focuses on helping couples build strong, secure relationships. She is not only a qualified professional, but has twenty years of marriage experience with her husband in addition to having two children. To find out more about Lesli, please visit her website at http://balancedfamily.com/

You can access a transcript of this show here.

Click below to play the show.