fighting

Is there a right way and a wrong way to argue?

The answer is yes. And the secret’s out. There is a right way and a wrong way to argue. Oftentimes when couples fight, it becomes husband versus wife, him against her. The issue with that, however, is that the entire sense of the “team” attitude within the couple gets lost in the mess.

With a relationship it’s not about not getting angry or not disagreeing because that’s unrealistic. The true key is staying emotionally connected to someone you view as a teammate in a generally positive way. According to relationship expert John Gottman, there are two types of problems within relationships: resolvable and perpetual; and two out of three problems are perpetual. Luckily, there are conflict resolution skills for each kind of problem that couples can learn and use to ultimately strengthen their marriages.

Today’s guest is Erica Blystone, a licensed clinical social worker with Lepage Associates. After more than 10 years of clinical work with adults, couples, children and families, Erica has seen her fair share of conflict within relationships, and she says there is a way to manage it effectively.

To find out more about Erica and her practice, visit their website or call (919) 572-0000 to schedule an appointment.

Are you and your partner thinking outside the box when it comes to your relationship?

Say you’ve been married for 20 years… Or maybe even just two years… Is the relationship still fun and fresh? Are you and your partner getting the most out of your marriage? Sometimes couples that have been together for many years begin to feel a sense of staleness in their relationship. Maybe they have ongoing conflict and difficulty resolving it, or maybe they simply feel like they’ve lost the passion and excitement they once had.

When this happens to a couple, whether they’ve been together for 20 years or two years, the partners begin to grow apart and disconnect from each other. And to fix the ongoing problem, many couples end up forcing a solution by pushing harder and ultimately doing the same thing over and over again.

Interestingly, the solution to all this is far more attainable than most people think.

Today’s guest is Dr. Susan Orenstein, the Director of Orenstein Solutions in Cary, NC. Susan says couples can reignite their passion and start having fun again simply by thinking outside the box. By doing even just one thing differently. And if you’re thinking you can’t do it– think again. Susan is here to share some of her creative and inspiring ideas for how couples can improve and strengthen their marriages.

To find out more about Susan and her practice, you can visit their website or call (919) 428-2766 to schedule an appointment.

We had our wedding, we had our honeymoon… Now what?

Think about your wedding day. Whether you’ve had it, or it hasn’t happened yet… Oftentimes, and especially in a society like ours, there’s a lot of pressure to make the wedding day perfect. To make sure everything is in order, to make sure the dresses are ready and the suits are pressed, to make sure the flowers will be beautiful and that all the guests will leave thinking, “hey, that was a really good time!”

But what about after the wedding? What happens when the guests have gone home, the party’s over and it’s just you and your new partner left with each other? Unfortunately, too many people spend a lot of time preparing for the wedding and not a whole lot of time thinking about what comes after- like how to actually make the marriage work successfully on a daily basis.

Today our guest is Kelly Saylor, a licensed professional counselor associate and marriage and family counselor associate with Healing Solutions Counseling Center in Charlotte, NC. According to Kelly, one of the most important things a married couple can do to help their relationship grow is to nurture the basic friendship they have with each other and the admiration they have for each other.

To find out more about Kelly and her practice, visit their website or call (704) 944-5530 t0 schedule an appointment.

If you and your partner are considering premarital or marital counseling, be sure to check out Healing Solutions’ programs here.