conflict

What’s the secret to having a happy husband?

What have you done for ME lately? Does that sound familiar? Chances are, that question does sound familiar. And it’s often right out of the mouth of wives who also might ask- why should I be nice to you if you’re not nice to me? But maybe those are the wrong questions to be asking. Sometimes, a big part of having a happy marriage is having a happy husband.

More often than not, kids and careers take priority over the marriage, and husbands and wives end up becoming more like roommates instead of best friends and lovers. When couples get overwhelmed with daily life tasks and the little things turn into big things, they might feel like they have no time to nurture their marriage and each other. Sometimes they even feel hopeless about rekindling their original flame. If you are feeling like your marriage is becoming more disconnected, tense, and unhappy altogether, perhaps the first step is changing your attitude toward your husband.

Today’s guest is author and public speaker, Arlene Pellicane. She’s been featured on shows like The Hour of Power, The 700 Club, and TLC’s Home Made Simple. We’ll be talking about Arlene’s book, 31 Days to a Happy Husband, and she’ll give us all a few pointers and tips on improving marriages that are just going through the motions.

To find out more about Arlene, her books and her speaking events, visit her website here.

 

How can you tell when your partner drinks too much? When does drinking become a problem?

Imagine meeting someone new. You start going out on romantic dates- dates that maybe include a bottle of wine, candles, roses, the whole nine yards. Initially, the alcohol acts as an intimacy and romance enhancer. It helps you both loosen up, relax, and enjoy yourselves. But what happens when down the road the alcohol becomes toxic? Sometimes stress and tension build up and eventually it’s one partner who drinks too much, too frequently.

When one partner begins to develop a drinking problem, the other might start to feel like the alcohol has taken top priority in the relationship. Any little bit of consumption could start to be a bid deal, and the partners could begin to withdraw from each other, creating an even bigger issue. With communication mishaps and increased fighting, oftentimes married partners don’t know how to go back and fix the issue.

Today, Dr. Julia Messer is talking with us about how to handle this issue if and when it arises. As a licensed psychologist with Orenstein Solutions in Cary, NC, she helps couples and individuals develop practical coping solutions for many different challenging situations.

To find out more about Julia and her practice, visit their website or call (919) 428-2766 to make an appointment.

If you were the reason for the fighting in your marriage, would you be able to admit you were the “I” in the storm?

One of the biggest challenges facing couples today is their inability to truly hear one another and recognize the unhealthy communication patterns that develop over time. In many cases it starts with one partner, the “I” in the storm. This partner becomes a force in the relationship that is somewhat like the “eye” of a hurricane- the area surrounded by the most severe conditions.

When negative communication patterns develop or have already been developed, the strength of the marriage can take a hit. And oftentimes it results in distance and contempt between partners. The majority of the time, all each partner really wants is for the other to understand them. But in the midst of arguing over a point, compassion and understanding can sometimes fly out the window.

Leslie Petruk is a child and family therapist who joins us to discuss the the biggest predictors of divorce, but also the key to resolving communication problems within a marriage. At her practice SteppingStones Counseling and Consulting in Charlotte, NC, Leslie works to help individuals and couples build more connected and mindful lives.

To find out more about Leslie and her practice, visit their website, or call (704) 335-6100 to make an appointment.

Stressed out with parenting duties? Check out Leslie’s website that offers tips and resources for when you’re feeling overwhelmed.